Tuesday, March 17, 2009

And the hits keep on coming...

What do people mean when they say "use coping mechanisms"? Because every well-intentioned counselor and friend who have made suggestions all seem to be something that comes from a bath product commercial... "Calgon take me away".

Did i mention the meds were well over-due?

When it hurts it's desperation that drives you, no amount of bubble bath or even ... can you believe it? ... yes even chocolate will not help.

For a long time (from childhood) dissociation was my coping mechanism. To this day it's why I can be quite the 'space cadet' and have trouble concentrating on pretty much anything. Well that and a habit of feigning being distracted when I did not hear you.

In an adolescent and adult world of schedules and stresses, cutting became a help. I'm sure theories as to how it was a manifestation of my need to feel, anything at all and to punish myself will no doubt come up in later posts but hey I must save some fun for later!

But now.... no effective replacements which means these old favorites linger...

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