thinking

I am trying to make what is probably a very simple decision but every decision seems monumental to me. I am very gun shy and questions everything. Can I handle this? Will this send me spinning further down? Will I make things worse without realizing it? I am still angry, is this ok? How do I stop? I am currently at the max dose of my meds. I will be going to the doctor to ask for more meds. But even this comes with conflict. Is there something i should be doing to feel better? I feel like i am working hard in therapy but it's hard and there is so much to work on. Do i deal with the "old" stuff which is important to deal with as I have never have or should I be working on current stuff which i know is affected by old stuff and frankly is very confusing and hard to process.